Forbear and Forgive

by Myra Shealy

Sometimes the irritating things that others do can seem so hard to live with. In a single day we are faced with many quirky, sometimes maddening, often thoughtless, and beyond that intentionally unkind things perpetrated against us by the people God has put in our lives. It is easy to become worn out by these things, and to begin to keep a record of wrongs. And if the conflict comes when I am trying to minister to someone and even sacrifice to help them, then their sins begin to feel as irritating as sand blown into my eyes, or a pebble in my shoe that grows with every step I take.

But as I've meditated on Colossians chapter 3, verse 13 has been especially helpful. It says, "bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, whoever has a complaint against anyone." Here is a clear prescription for dealing with those who sin against us. Christ calls us to forbear and forgive. That means putting up with all those irritations and further, direct acts of unkindness, and forgiving the ones who do those things. That is what true, unconditional love chooses to do.

When my heart needs motivation to do this, I focus on the very next phrase, "just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you." For me, nothing shrinks the irritating sins of others down to size like being reminded of my own sins. I stand before the Lord each day as a debtor who owed a debt that was too great to ever be repaid. But because the One I owed is merciful, He Himself paid my debt for me and forgave it all. Keeping my eyes on the cross, and the mercy I received that I didn't deserve, helps me love and give grace to those around me, whether they deserve it or not.

I daily need the change that focusing on the Gospel brings to my own heart. His grace given to me shrinks the boulders in my shoe back down to pebble size.